I would rather be poor in Austria.

Dear readers,

I was contemplating writing a blog entry around how it would be better to be a poor person here in Austria versus the USA.  Then this BBC Panorama program aired entitled "Poor America."

Restaurants we like --- updated

Note to reader:  Sorry for the unintentional highlighting, that's what happens when you cut and paste while the Spellcheck feature is enabled...

As my wife, Rachel, is a vegetarian, it can at times be challenging to find good Veggie-friendly options in this meat eater's paradise.

So, for your knowledge and mine, I am dedicating this post to good places to find Veggie options.  

1.  Der Wiener Deewan- Pakistani Food.  This is definitely not a romantic setting for an important occasion.  Instead, it's buffet style all you can eat with an interesting catch, you pay what you want- for the food.  There are usually six buffet options, half vegetarian.  The fare is similar to Indian with lentil based dishes, potatoes and vegetables eaten over rice and with a special bread.  You can also order drinks here (Beer, wine, etc.) off the menu which lists drinks' prices.  Situated near the Vienna University, this place gets a lot of patronage from students and it can be difficult to find a booth.

2. Bankok Vienna- Thai food.  Here is a restaurant with beautiful decor complementing good Thai cuisine.  We've eaten here twice without a reservation around 6 pm (18:00) and had no problems getting a table.  However, we've noticed it starts to get busy as we're leaving so reservations are recommended.  Typical Thai fare with good Pad Thai and a delicious Red Curry with Vegetables under the Vegetarian offerings.  For four people with drinks, expect to pay around 60 Euros--- pretty reasonable from our experiences.  This would be an appropriate venue for a special evening out!

3.  Colombo Hoppers-  Sri Lanka food.  The cuisine is similar to Indian.  We've been there twice.  The first time, we went for dinner, it was good but a bit pricey.  This place is definitely not dining on the cheap.  The second time, we showed up for a lunch buffet (on weekdays only?).  

If you have the chance, the lunch buffet was a good value and there were vegetarian as well as meat options. 

4. Rachel's colleague took us to this cool Italian place specializing in thin crust individual serving pizzas. It's called Pizza Mari in the 2nd district.  We wholeheartedly recommend the buffalo mozzarella pizza.  Enjoy!

5.  A cool place in our neighborhood that we've discovered is called Gelbmann's Gaststube (Wilhelminenstraße 62, 1160 Wien).   This places serves more local Viennese cuisine.  There's not much on offer for Vegetarians but I had some Speck Knodel with Sauerkraut there that was amazing.  Speck Knodel are two large Matzoh ball looking dumplings stuffed with bacon in this case.  Sometimes they are also stuffed with Spinach.  I like this place because it serves traditional Viennese food in a traditional setting surrounded by locals!

6.  The last place I'll list here serves Nepali cuisine.  It's called "Yakundyeti" and it's located on Hofmühlgasse 21, 1060 Wien.  This place is a must for Vegetarians.  There are some dishes on the menu which give a sampler of their specialities.  The cuisine is characterized by lentils, potatoes, and other staples.  What sets it apart is the seasonings and sauces!  

7.  Finally, if you like a big bowl of Pho (Vietnamese soup), I'd recommend checking out Saigon Restaurant located in the Naschmarkt.  http://www.saigon.at/home.php

I have ordered the Pho with chicken and glass noodles twice and have not been disappointed.  They also have a small market attached to the back of the restaurant which offers imported Asian food products.  I was able to buy a small bottle of this red spicy sauce called Sriracha there.  

One warning:  this place is really small and usually packed.  If you are a party of two, they'll seat you at a four person table but if another couple comes in, they'll pull the table a millimeter apart and seat that couple next to you.  It is not an intimate environment but might be a good opportunity to enjoy lunch with some strangers! 

Learning a foreign language

Learning a foreign language is one of those things on everyone's bucket list.  “Before I die, I'd like to learn German/Italian/Farsi/Hindi...”   Learning a language can be daunting, but success depends on one’s ultimate goal.  

I remember going to college, being surrounded by international students and feeling truly amazed and jealous at their ability to switch effortlessly between two languages.  At that time, I had four years of high school French under my belt along with several semesters in college.  I was somewhat proud of my ability in a foreign language, but nobody would have mistaken me for a native French speaker.

When living in Budapest for several years, I took a three-hour-per-day, five-day-per-week intensive course of study in Hungarian.  I was 25 years old when I started learning Hungarian.  It should be noted that Hungarian is my father's native tongue.  However, also worth noting is that except for a few polite terms, I learned almost no Hungarian from my father.

So, at the age of 25, I started learning a language which most seem to think is one of the most difficult in the world. From that learning experience and others since, I have come to some conclusions about learning a foreign language.

First, anyone at any age can learn a foreign language.  The simplest components of language are its basic sounds.  Sounds combine to form words, words combine to form phrases, and phrases  communicate meaning.  But many find learning to create a new sound daunting as an adult.  For instance, I had a difficult time rolling the letter ‘R’, and I don’t feel that I mastered it until my mid-20s.  However, regardless of where we are born, we all have the same tools for creating sounds -- basically our tongues, teeth, mouth cavity, and throat.  With proper instruction and practice, anyone can learn to make new sounds.

Second, when you start to learn a second language, you must define your end goal.  Perhaps I differ from many in not viewing perfection as an end goal.  Instead, I hope to communicate.  This means if I want to order a Bratwurst in a roll with a little mustard in German, I have the words and syntactic structure to communicate my desire, even though I may not know whether Bratwurst and mustard are feminine, masculine, or neuter, or which corresponding article to use to express something more complicated about Bratwurst and mustard.  

Here is why perfection is an unrealistic, even asinine goal:   Now, in my 30s, if I want to be perfect in German, perhaps I will compare myself to my native speaking German peers.  But this is unrealistic because they have been immersed in a Germa-only environment for 30+ years of their life.  Just to compare it to American students, each year of schooling in the US equals something like 10,000 new words.  I have met people who aim to overcome this vocabulary hurdle by learning 50 new words every day.  I have rarely seen this as a successful strategy.

Furthermore, you don't need that many words if your goal is day-to-day communication.  The vocabulary needed for daily spoken interaction amounts to far, far fewer than 10,000 words.  Think of the many people around the world who manage to interact successfully and communicate effectively, even though they only completed five years of schooling.  Still others have never completed even one full year, yet they speak a language sufficiently well to satisfy their daily needs.

So, when you start to learn a language, define your end goal realistically!
For example, I'm learning German now.

let's look at the verb 'gehen' which means to go.
I can now conjugate this verb in three tenses: Present, Perfekt, and Prateritum.

Ich gehe zu Hause.  I go home.  OR  I am going home.
Sie geht zu Hause.  She goes home. OR She is going home.

Perfekt is the past tense used for spoken interactions.

Ich bin zu Hause gegangen.  I went home.

Prateritum is the past form used for writing and reading.

Ich ging zu Hause.  I went home.

So, arguably, with just these three tenses, I can speak, read, and write in the Present and Past.
In many cases, one can also communicate in German in the future tense using the present tense construction.

Therefore, if my goal is being able to communicate day to day needs in spoken language, what more do I need than the ability to speak in past, present, and the future?

So, to sum it up --
You CAN learn a foreign language at any age.
You CAN learn to hear and make new sounds at any age.
You should BE REALISTIC about your goals.  If your aim is to communicate via spoken language successfully with others, you don't need nearly as much vocabulary or grammatical training as you think.

Therefore, if learning another language is on your bucket list, recognize that if you are reading and understanding these words, you already have many skills in your first language which will help you succeed in a second.

AND THEN... you can even learn a third.

Correction: I touched a monkey

Thanks to Erich for the below correction: 
... there are at least two more of these "Flacktuerme" (anti-aircraft towers) still standing in Vienna. One of them can be seen from my office - it's in the Augarten in the 20th district. I forget where the other one is. 

I touched a monkey, actually fed one

Today, I took a field trip with my first graders and my colleague, Michi. 

We went to the Haus des Meeres.  I have been very curious about this place for several reasons.  First, the name Haus des Meeres translates to "Sea's House" which made me think of an aquarium.  However, on the side of the building in large blue letters is "ZOO".  In the end, it is more like an aquarium although there is a tropical room that has colorful birds and small monkeys.  The other interesting thing about this building is it's the only anti-aircraft tower left from the Second World War.  There used to be an anti-aircraft battery atop this tower. 

Here's a picture of the building:

  

As you can see from the picture, the building also has a climbing wall on its outer face. 

Inside, it is most definitely an aquarium with giant tanks displaying hammerhead sharks, Japanese spider crabs (which live in deeper than 1000 feet), a giant green turtle, and assorted fish.

Perhaps the coolest part of the excursion for me was when we got to feed the monkeys.  Actually, they weren't monkeys. I cannot remember their name now but they were a smaller relative of the capuchin. 

Here's a picture:

We had a cool tour guide named Phillip.  Phillip would excuse himself and return with a small plastic crate full of wood chips (sawdust) with maggots crawling underneath.  Then, he would fish out a maggot, place it in his hand and steadily hold his hand by the wooden beam where the monkeys would then appear.  They would walk over to Phillip, grab the maggot and escape to the trees to eat their lunch. 

At the time, I imagined we were feeding them worms but later a couple corrected me, they were maggots.  (It was easier to hold them in my hand if I called them worms!)

Most impressive of all was the six-year-old first graders in our class that were able to feed the monkeys.  Obviously some of them were grossed out by the maggots while others were scared of the monkeys.  Maybe it was reassuring that I was so active in both holding the maggots and feeding the monkeys thus enabling so many of the children to overcome their hesitations. 

In the end, it was a really cool experience having such tame, cute little capuchins (or whatever they were) come right up and eat out of my hand. 

It goes down in my history of cool animal interactions second only to swimming with the green turtles on several occasions in Barbados. 

What's up with this blog?

This blog is the brainchild of Andrew Lantos with some editing and contributions by his wife.

This blog was started when these two individuals chose to completely uproot their life in Baltimore and move to Vienna, Austria  (A life that, in retrospect, was quiet, easy, relaxing and meant relatively lucrative jobs for both of us).

But instead of contentment, the heroes of this blog left...all friends and family behind to venture forth to Vienna, Austria.  A place where, from day one, they had no apartment, no friends, no family, a very minor knowledge of the language (almost none), and Andrew had no job.  Luckily, Rachel's already-obtained employment meant we would not starve from the beginning (although in truth we ate a lot of pasta during the month of August before Rachel's first paycheck arrived.)

So, to all those brave souls looking to venture out in the darkness without compass or guide, here is what it is like to leave behind all you know, all means of communication, and start completely over in a foreign country.

Hopefully, through our misadventures, some questions will arise which you had previously given little thought.  Perhaps, before you go abroad, you will do more thorough research both of your potential job prospects and the job market in your chosen country as well as to the local real estate system.

If you are a first-time visitor to this blog, you should look through the archive as we have already discussed many pertinent details such as:  how much it costs living here versus in the US (with figures), the realities of the Viennese real estate market and how much savings you need in order to rent here, and other details of day to day life.

We welcome you to our adventure and we hope you learn from our mistakes...

Cheers,
Andrew

European nudity: Are Americans too modest?

Why are Americans so modest?  Or maybe the better question is, why do Europeans love nudity so much? When I assert that Americans are modest, you might think I’m nuts. One only needs to tune into MTV’s shows like Jersey Shore or The Real World to think American “kids today” have no shame at all.  Perhaps times are changing in that regard, but regarding nudity and as a Gen X-er, I remain conservative, prudish, and painfully modest -- especially relative to my European cousins.

Europeans have a reputation for being more liberated in this regard, and it really turns out to be true.  For instance, here in Austria you can go to any (any!) one of the many spas in the area and find not only saunas where co-eds mingle together in the buff, but naked swimming hours. And don’t think you can get away with being special, because swim suits in the sauna are actually verboten (forbidden). I asked my friends here about this phenomenon, immediately mentally leaping to interesting scenarios where friends go to the spa together (because they do).  “How does that work?” I ask.  “Don’t you feel weird if your best friend’s checking out your girlfriend’s junk?”  What happens if you run into someone you know?” “You went with your colleague from work…and his wife???” Inevitably, they laugh at me.  A lot.  My wife got the same reaction when she asked whether you get a modesty gown at the gynecologist.  She explained how at regular appointments in the U.S., she gets a garment that lets them uncover only one part of her body at a time.  But here apparently, she’s told that the doctor comes in, she strips down, jumps up on the table, and he goes for it.  Lots of medical practices have migrated from the U.S. to Europe, but sadly for her, the modesty gown is not one of them. 

Other superfluous nudity: In our furnished apartment, there’s a small folksy painting hanging in our bathroom showing a man sitting on the toilet with his wanker in his hands. Translated, the caption reads, ‘please, I’m pissing.’  I don’t know why, but it makes me uncomfortable, this naked cartoon man.  Then, weekly we get junk mail fliers from local stores that casually feature topless women.  Mind you, these are not underwear ads, these are ads for very non-sexual things, like end tables and kitchen furnishings.  Why the nudity? I don’t know, but I refer you to my assertion – Europeans just love nudity.  (As a side note, I also tell you that these weekly circulars, which any 3-year-old could pick up off the family dinner table, include ads for sex toys, S&M accessories, and ben-wah balls. There is no surreptitious packaging or special naughty mailing list – it’s just the weekly specials at the Love Factory, naturally.)

Our friends in Europe find much hilarity with our being so scandalized about their comfort with nudity.  We’re told, “You don’t stare at the spa, that’s not polite.”  “Doctors are trained professionals. Get over it.”  “Sex is natural and so is the human body.”  And we’re asked, “Why are Americans so repressed?” A stock answer is that it’s because the Europeans shipped all the Puritans to America, so why would we be exhibitionists? There’s probably a real good explanation for these differences that an anthropologist could offer, and much as I wish I could be more liberated, I really don’t think I’ll ‘get over it’ anytime soon. All I know is that when I’m naked, I feel more than naked. For unexplained reasons, I feel like my soul is showing.

New Panorama pics of Vienna

Only 36 hours in Vienna? No Problem!

Thanks to Chris for passing along this article.

Source: New York Times

Source: http://travel.nytimes.com/2012/01/08/travel/36-hours-vienna.html?src=dayp

FOR years, Vienna has lingered in the fading glory of the fin-de-siècle era, understandably satisfied with the grandeur of its Hapsburg-era architecture and parks. Now a new wind is blowing through this imperial city, with the opening of dazzling hotels, new and renovated museums and a reinvention of the gasthaus, that ubiquitous pub where Viennese artists and philosophers, workers and shopkeepers linger over schnitzel and beer well into the night. This year, the city celebrates the 150th birthday of its most famous artistic export, Gustav Klimt, whose gold-toned paintings will be on display at 10 of the city’s museums.

Friday

4 p.m.
1. EXPLORING THE QUARTIER

Last year marked the 10th anniversary of the MuseumsQuartier, the former Hapsburg stables turned culture plaza. Mumok (Museumsplatz 1; 43-1-52500-0;mumok.at), the museum of contemporary art housed in a basalt lava cube on the plaza, has a new director, Karola Kraus, who has already made her mark with a show called “Museum of Desires,” which reorganized the five-floor permanent collection of modern art. Wander the galleries, then stop at Café Halle (Museumsplatz 1; 43-1-523-70-01;www.diehalle.at.) for a mini-obstkuchen (fresh fruit tart, 2 euros, or $2.56 at $1.28 to the euro). The romantic yet modern restaurant, its walls hung with billowing sheer curtains, is tucked into the former private quarters of the emperor. Downstairs, photography exhibitions in theKunsthalle Wien (Museumsplatz 1; 43-1-521-89-33;kunsthallewien.at) draw crowds.

5 p.m.
2. CAFé-KULTUR

Café Sperl (Gumpendorferstrasse 11; 43-1-586-41-58;cafesperl.at) is among the most iconic of the city’s legendary turn-of-the-century coffeehouses, with velvet banquettes where you can have a small brauner (espresso) for 2.60 euros. Then cross the street to Phil (Gumpendorferstrasse 10-12; 43-1-581-04-89; phil.info), a Berlin-style bookstore/music shop/coffeehouse with mismatched furniture, D.J.’s and a late-night bar ripe for experiencing the newer side of Vienna’s cafe culture.

8 p.m.
3. TRADITIONAL, OR NOT

For classic Viennese cuisine at an old-is-new-again gasthaus, head for Schilling (Burggasse 103; 43-1-524-17-75; schilling-wirt.at), distinct for its 1950s fixtures and traditional dishes like Kalbbutterschnitzel (veal butter schnitzel, 14.50 euro) and böhmische palatschinken (a dessert pancake with plum sauce, 6 euros). Some Viennese swear the future is places like Skopik & Lohn (Leopoldgasse 17; 43-1-219-89-77; skopikundlohn.at), which kicks Austrian food (and prices) up a notch with dishes like Arctic char over creamed yellow beets (19 euros) in a wildly artistic space, with walls covered in black scribbles. Grab a drink nearby at A Bar Shabu (Rotensterngasse 8; 43-650-544-59-39), with small bites, wine, beer and absinthe menu (glass, from 4.90 euros).

10 p.m.
4. DECISIONS, DECISIONS

Fluc (Praterstern 5; fluc.at) is a club built in a former pedestrian passageway at the Prater metro stop with a stage for live music, D.J.’s and large beer steins (about 3 euros). Or, to experience the new underground scene, go to Brut (Lothringerstrasse 20; 43-1-587-87-74;brut-wien.at), a center for “international, experimental and innovative performance art” (i.e., general mayhem) held in the cellar of the Wiener Konzerthaus (entrance 6 to 30 euros). Looking for calm? Have a drink at Motto am Fluss (Schwedenplatz 2; 43-1-252-55-11; motto.at/mottoamfluss), a new bar on the Danube Canal.

Saturday

9 a.m.
5. TO MARKET

Order an espresso (3.50 euros) and breakfast at one of the dozens of restaurants that line the edge of the century-old Naschmarkt before the crowds arrive. The open-air market is a mile long, stretching between Karlsplatz and Kettenbrückengasse U-bahn stations. Filled with stalls stocked with produce, baked goods, flowers and spices, it is easily one of the best in Europe. On Saturdays, hawkers selling antiques and bric-a-brac branch out for another mile.

11 a.m.
6. ROYAL AFFAIR

If you’ve seen one royal boudoir, you’ve seen them all, so skip the Imperial Apartmentsand head to the magnificent State Hall of the Austrian National Library (Josefsplatz 1; 43-1-534-102-52; onb.ac.at; 7 euros) tucked inside the Hapsburg palace complex in the First District. It was built by Emperor Charles VI in the late 17th century, with a soaring frescoed ceiling, 200,000 books dating from 1500, and antique globes scattered about; you’ll feel like you’ve stepped inside a storybook. Then stop at Café Braünerhof, (Stallburggasse 2; 43-1-512-38-93), the late novelist Thomas Bernhard’s favorite cafe to while away an afternoon. On Saturday afternoons, classical musicians play, and the waiters are appropriately rude.

3 p.m.
7. SHOP AROUND

In the Seventh District many shops carry maps showing all the locally made and European sourced clothing shops. Try Camille Boyer (Lindengasse 25/2; camilleboyer.at) for buttery soft, dove-gray hobo bags from Lumi (175 euros). Or Buntwaesche (Lindengasse 31-33; 43-664-780-44-61; buntwaesche.at) for super-soft cotton children’s clothing in adorable prints (T-shirts from 20 euros). Wabisabi (Lindengasse 20; 43-664-54-51-280; alle-tragen-wabi-sabi.at/) sells Japanese-style geometric-cut women’s clothing, entirely in black and white. Across the street at Werkprunk (Kirchengasse 7/11, enter at Lindengasse 23; 43-1-990-64-32; werkprunk.com) sisters Jasmin and Silvia König make jewelry out of sterling silver and semiprecious stones (35 to 700 euros).

7:30 p.m.
8. RETURN TO THE CLASSICS

Classical music is everywhere in this city, from the Musikverein to the Wiener Konzerthausto the Volksoper and beyond. Not to be overlooked is the Wiener Staatsballett (the Vienna State Ballet) at the Staatsoper. A former star of the Paris Opera Ballet, Manuel Legris, became director in 2010; a seat in his house is a treat (tickets online at wiener-staatsoper.at from 8 to 130 euros).

9:30 p.m.
9. KITCHEN CONFIDENTIAL

Down a winding First District street is Gasthaus Pöschl (Weihburggasse 17; 43-1-513-52-88), with simple wood tables, whitewashed walls and a menu that is consistently excellent. Try favorites like roasted calf’s liver (15.10 euros) or gnocchi with a sauce of spinach and sheep cheese (8.90). Too heavy? Duck into the smoky Kleines Café (Franziskanerplatz 3) and try an open-faced tartine for under 5 euros.

11 p.m.
10. RED DAWN

Die Rote Bar, at the magnificent Volkstheater (Neustiftgasse 1; 43-699-150-150-14;rotebar.at), opened in 1889. It is a marvel of belle-époque architecture, with a chandelier and frescoes of revelers from the 1880s, dressed (and lighted) entirely in red. Saturday is “club night,” which means everything from D.J.’s to burlesque.

Sunday

10 a.m.
11. AMUSE YOURSELF

In the mid-18th century, the Prater, once a royal hunting ground, morphed into what it is today: a European Coney Island. The iconic red Riesenrad — the Ferris wheel of “Third Man” fame — still dominates. Newest is the stomach-dropping PraterTurm, a swing that takes you nearly 400 feet in the air and whips you around at 38 m.p.h. (5 euros). The 360-degree view of the city, if you can open your eyes, is spectacular. As winter sets in, ice skating rinks open across the city. Try the enormous Wiener Eislaufverein, by the InterContinental Hotel (Lothringerstrasse 22; 43-1-713-63- 53; wev.or.at/; 6.50 euros for adults, 5.50 skate rentals).

11:30 a.m.
12. WALK ON BY

The white palace in the center of Augarten park has produced handmade Viennese porcelain since 1923. Last summer the palace opened the sleek restaurant Décor, decorated entirely in gray and green, with a 7-euro lunch menu (Obere Augartenstrasse 1; 43-1-212-38-88; decor-augarten.at). Or try nearby Am Nordpol, a kitschy-art-filled gasthaus with a hearty Bohemian kitchen (Nordwestbahnstrasse 17; 43-1-333-58-54;amnordpol3.at/).

1 p.m.
13. OLD TOWN, NEW ART

Check out the display of Judaica in the recently overhauled Jewish Museum (Dorotheergasse 11; 43-1-535-04-31; jmw.at; 10 euros), then take tram D and ride up to 21er Haus (Arsenalstrasse 1; 43-1-795-57-70; 21erhaus.at; 5 euros). Designed for the 1958 Brussels World’s Fair by Karl Schwanzer, this glass-and-steel temple of modernism is now a monument to postwar art, with exhibitions, a rehabilitated 1960s-era cinema, and a cafe. Then wander next door into the Schloss Belvedere and the Gustav Klimt/Josef Hoffmann exhibition (on display through April), which opened the Klimt anniversary year.

IF YOU GO

25 Hours (Lerchenfelder Strasse 1-3; 43-1-521-510; 25hours-hotels.com/wien), the first outpost of a small design chain from Germany, opened last spring. The rooftop bar offers fantastic views of downtown. Rooms from 120 euros ($155).

The luxury Fleming’s Hotel behind the Rathaus (Josefstädter Strasse 10-12; 43-1-205-990, flemings-hotels.com) opened in February 2011 with gorgeous wood-paneled rooms; “city view” rooms offer great vistas; 130 to 200 euros.

This article has been revised to reflect the following correction:

Correction: January 6, 2012

A previous version of this article misspelled the name of the Ferris wheel in the Prater and also misspelled, at one point, the German for “Vienna” in a reference to a concert hall. The Ferris wheel is the Riesenrad, not Reisenrad, and the concert hall is Wiener Konzerthaus, not Weiner. An accompanying map repeated the errors.

New Year's Eve Fireworks on our street

Although we were informed by our landlady it is illegal to shoot off fireworks on the street, these fireworks were filmed from our 1st floor window.  

Happy New Year!
Alles gut zum Neues Jahr!
Gutes Neues Jahr!

Vienna New Year's Eve TV celebrations!

How Europeans view American politicians

Source: The week magazine

(theweek.com)

The GOP makes a virtue of ignorance

The European press registers its shock at the goings-on in the selection of a Republican nominee for the presidency.

POSTED ON DECEMBER 8, 2011, AT 3:30 PM

The Republican presidential contest in America is a “freak show,” said Marc Pitzke in the German Der Spiegel. The candidates vie with one another to spew the most outrageous hard-right positions, denying evolution while endorsing torture and joking about electrocuting illegal immigrants. How did a major party in the world’s sole superpower become a “club of liars, debtors, betrayers, adulterers, exaggerators, hypocrites, and ignoramuses?” These know-nothings are enabled by a U.S. press that has been “neutered by the demands of political correctness” so that it can’t say what’s obvious: These people are daft! Instead, it “proclaims one clown after the next to be the new front-runner.” The current favorite, Newt Gingrich, is actually considered an intellectual merely because he can create sentences with multiple clauses. Scarcely a one has even the most basic grasp of foreign policy. One said Africa is a country, another that the Taliban rule in Libya. Collectively, “they expose a political, economic, geographic, and historical ignorance that makes George W. Bush look like a scholar.”

That’s the scariest part, said Lorraine Millot in the Paris Libération. The only GOP candidate who knows a thing about diplomacy, Jon Huntsman, is dead last in most polls. The others “careen to extreme positions that include starting new wars and abandoning old allies.” And that’s when they even have a position. Herman Cain, now thankfully out of the race, was the front-runner even though he couldn’t find a single coherent word to say about President Obama’s policy on Libya. He even boasted of knowing little about foreign countries. And yet it was his adultery, not his astounding ignorance, that brought him down. 

There’s a simple explanation for this bizarre phenomenon, said Max Hastings in the London Daily Mail. In the “lunatic, gun-toting badlands of America’s Hicksville, Tea Party country,” it’s considered suspiciously elitist to show any interest in modern science or the world beyond America’s borders. “Say what you like about British politics, no MP of any party would dare to offer themselves as town dogcatcher while knowing as little about the world as the Republican presidential candidates.” We take public service seriously. Yet we in Britain, and everyone in the rest of the world, will suffer if “one of the lunatics” vying for the nomination makes it to the White House. “The American political system has seldom, if ever, looked so inadequate.”

Don’t worry, said Matthew Norman in the London Independent. The fact that Gingrich is the latest threat to Mitt Romney’s inevitability just “confirms how inevitable” Romney’s nomination is. The thrice-married, ethically challenged Gingrich is unlikable in the extreme. Which means the nominee will be Romney, “the slimiest, phoniest opportunist to run for president since...well, ever.” So sit back and enjoy this circus passing for a presidential election. It can’t possibly end in a GOP victory. Can it?